Life Is An Exciting Journey

I have lived in different countries and various cities in India, which makes me feel like a traveller not bound to any land ― this gives me a feeling of oneness with the world and a sense of non-attachment with any particular place. I feel enriched with the experience of living in different climes and cultures. But the one central learning in my places of residence is that we are all human and care for each other, because we are all connected, no matter what our race and religion!

As a youngster, being a table tennis player, I travelled to different parts of India. In fact, despite a lot of travelling, I had never been to Mumbai till I came to live there for the first time in 2006. It was love at first night for Mumbai, as I landed in the city in the midst of the rainy season, which is so exquisite and romantic, not really in a boy-meets girl scenario, but in a nature-caresses human sense.  We had planned to shift from Mumbai to Greater Noida in April, this year, but the Covid-19 crisis stalled our move. I consider this as a blessing in disguise, because it allowed me to enjoy one more scintillating monsoon in Mumbai.

The Indian metros that I have lived in include Delhi , Mumbai and Chennai. I have missed living in Kolkata but have visited the city often. I feel a special connection  with Kolkata for some unknown but mystical reason ― may be some past life link.

I was born and brought up in Kanpur, UP. My first relocation after marriage was from Kanpur to Delhi. Compared to laid-back Kanpur, life appeared hard and fast paced in Delhi. From there I shifted to Moscow. It was the most amazing phase of my life. I learnt a lot about life and people. I met people of many other countries too. It was an exciting journey for a young mom with a two-year-old to live in a place where getting the basics like milk was a struggle.

It was my first visit abroad and that too in deep winter with no clue about the Russian language. In Moscow, no one used hello but greeted each other in local Rusi only. Being young has its advantage, as you are open to learning and adapting more easily. In fact, it was through my Moscow experience that I learnt to adapt in any place and under any circumstances.

It was a difficult place to live and on top of that as soon as we landed there, within a week, USSR broke into many countries. I saw the struggle of ordinary Russians and how suddenly everyone had fallen below poverty line, because of the falling value of the Rouble and high inflation. But for the young me, it was exciting to watch tankers on the road and fighter planes in the sky.

When one is young, fear has no meaning. I enjoyed all the struggles and admired the patience and resilience of the local people. I found Russians very friendly and helpful towards Indians. I even received a bouquet of roses (expensive in harsh winters where roses don’t grow) from a flower seller at Sochi airport because she loved Indians. It was so touching when a stranger stopped me on the road and advised me to cover my son’s legs properly as the temperature was many degrees below zero. I was unaware that one leg of my son was exposed.

I was delighted to learn that India is the first foreign country they study about in Russian schools. I have enough stories from my stay there to write a few chapters of a book. I learnt a lot about people and life while living in Moscow. On the flip side, I developed a special dislike for communism.

From Moscow we shifted to Sharjah, UAE, and my first impression was that it’s like living in a modern Indian city. No one used the word Dirham, the local currency but instead every one referred to rupiah when referring to the price of any good. My writing habit started from Sharjah. I used to comment on newspaper reports and send them to the letters to the editor column and almost every other day I was published in Gulf News.

From UAE, we shifted to Singapore and it was again a new experience altogether. My stay in Singapore was the least colourful, even though it is one of the most disciplined and modern countries in the world. But I loved the heavy downpour in Singapore which is a daily affair. The only thing that scared me was the thunder and lightning that accompanied it. Every day lightning used to used to strike in some place or the other. All the buildings including bus stops had anti-lightning devices to keep people safe.

I was amazed how after the heavy downpour stopped, there was never any water logging anywhere. The drainage system was excellent. All the three countries I stayed in taught me that people follow rules and regulations, only if there is some fear of authorities and punishment and that’s the reason their cities look modern and developed. Of course, education makes a difference too. I had few letters published in Singapore newspapers, too.

 Living in foreign countries was wonderful. But my son could not make strong school bonds with anyone, because he was changing schools too often.  When he was in the eighth standard, we decided to move back to India to provide stability to our son till he got into some professional course. The positive aspect from my son’s development perspective was that he was exposed to various cultures and learnt to adapt to new school systems. In fact, he learnt Russian, Arabic and French too. Even today, he retains the basic knowledge of all the three languages.

Once my son was admitted into IIT, we started moving around in India. My first move was to Mumbai. I think, I had the best time of my life in Thane, a city adjoining Mumbai. I made such lovely friends there that I am still in touch with them and really miss the good times we had together. We then shifted to Chennai. This was the first  relocation in India, where I felt a little handicapped due to language, but I was able to overcome the problem easily because most people in our apartment block were very friendly and helpful.

After a long gap of two decades, I started teaching in a school in Chennai. I got a lot of love from children as well as their parents. At times North Indian friends complained about discrimination in school. However, I never experienced it. I realised that we have to give respect to get respect.

Having lived in many places, I have realised that if we learn to respect local culture, rituals and practices, then we are always welcomed warmly, but if we ridicule or make fun or pretend to be superior then we are bound to meet with some hostility from the locals. We all are different and India is a land of diversity. If we learn to adapt to local lifestyles, we will never have any cause for complaints.

From Mumbai, where I am now, I am soon going to move to Noida in UP. It’s like going back to the roots or completing the circle that started when I first moved from UP to Delhi and now back to UP.

Every place has some positives and some negatives. We have to adjust and adapt to make the most of our time in any place. Complaining and whining doesn’t help. It’s better to look at positives and adapt accordingly to make our life peaceful and happy. All humans experience similar emotions, so basically we are all same ― connected, and part of one big family.

 I have learnt a lot by living in different places and I am what I am today because of different experiences in life. From believing in the goodness of everyone to becoming a little cynical  because of selfishness and meanness of certain people, to returning back to believing all are basically good, I feel blessed to have lived and experienced different cultures around the world.

The biggest gain has been learning how to be detached to things that I had to leave behind for various reasons and learning to make new friends every time. I am no longer possessive about anything; I do not regret anything; I do no keep grudges against anyone. I have learnt to accept people as they are. Life is the biggest teacher, if we venture out to explore and make the most of any moment. The more we travel, the more we learn.

However, I must add that the Covid-19 crisis has made our relocation to UP a little difficult, because of so many uncertainties. For the first time in my life, I am feeling a little apprehensive, not because it’s again a new place, but I am unsure of whether the relocation and transition will be easy because of the restrictions in place. However, I believe that life is a challenge and adventure. So, cheers to a new experience round the corner ― really excited and look forward to our first flight with Covid-19 norms. After all, life is an exciting, adventurous journey!

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Nita Agarwal is an ex-Table Tennis State player, qualified teacher, self-taught budding painter, a successful blogger, who writes about her observations of life and people; and most importantly, a working housewife. 

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