Given that humans are so interdependent and interconnected, SUMITA CHAINANI KATARIA recommends a five-point formula to build bridges of understanding with each other
Humans are the only species born with super intelligence. We have amazing power within us. But we haven’t even tried to fully explore our assets owing to our conditioned mind. This is because as children we are not taught about our connectivity and interdependence with all living and nonliving entities.
We are not taught that our presence in this world is interconnected with other things present everywhere. We are taught that we come and go alone. But if we think deeply about this, we will realise this is not true.
We must realise that we are born here with this body, which is made of five basic elements, the panchamahabhutas. These elements are present everywhere in other forms, too. Therefore, it follows that all living beings are strongly interconnected with each other, considering that we are all made from the same panchamahabhutas.
So, one cannot label himself or herself as independent. The fact is we are all interdependent, because we are so very connected.
Whatever we need in our life comes through direct and indirect sources. We need people to work with; we also need animals for so many reasons. We need proper surroundings to live comfortably and harmoniously.
Just one roti which we eat is procured after so many processes, with the help of so many people and other resources. Unfortunately, we don’t value all of them because we lack the deep understanding of our existence ― interdependence and interpersonal relationships.
Humans have the amazing ability to think and act and to react to various situations sensibly, whereas, animals do not posses this faculty. The human brain is considered large compared to other species. Humans have the ability to understand emotions and experiences of other people. The most amazing thing about humans is that they have the talent and power of influencing, controlling, shaping and transforming other living and nonliving things.
Humans can train animals, birds and other species. They are so intelligent that they can bring tremendous changes in other things. No other species are as intelligent as humans.
If we have so much power to influence others, then we can definitely use this to transform our own selves, too, and become more useful and helpful in maintaining the balance of everything around us, simply by understanding the perspective of others.
But our perception of others depends on our upbringing, different life experiences and social factors. Everyone’s perception is different, depending on one’s behaviour and also on one’s karma in previous lives. Because of these differences, it is difficult to maintain perfect interpersonal relationships with each other, even though we might be aware that we are all interdependent and interconnected.
Different perceptions lead to different conclusions, resulting in confusion and even failure to recognise the value of each other. In order to overcome this dilemma, we must understand one simple reality ― though everyone is different, each one has his or her value…nobody is superior or inferior.
We are just different. That is how the Creator intended it to be. This is what makes life and people, interesting. Isn’t it?
So, to maintain interpersonal relationships with everyone because we are interdependent, I recommend the following five-point formula:
1. We must humbly accept the differences between us and others.
2. We should listen to others carefully, not to just listen, but to understand their point of view and their actual intention.
3. We must not judge others by jumping to our own conclusions.
4. We must take the responsibility of our own perception of others, because we really don’t know the actual mindset of other people.
5. Most importantly, we must analyse our thoughts before judging others or coming to any conclusion.
Sumita Chainani Kataria, proud mother of three children, believes in human values. A commerce graduate, she holds a diploma in both business management and marketing management and has done a number of courses in web designing and photoshop. She loves to write poems and blogs on spirituality and emotional subjects.
Featured Image: Nishant Aneja from Pexels
Truly, as the spirit of the blog suggests, “understanding” lies at the heart of not merely human but every relationship. Understanding is the building block as well as the life breath of all relationships.
What it takes to reach at an understanding? If we can notice, in the heart of the word itself lies the hidden meaning suggesting us to under-stand or stand underneath a context with reverence so that we light up to the knowledge inherent in it. As it is said: the more knowledge is inherent in a thing, the greater is our love for it. And when it happens, then gets resolved all our conflicts.
What comes between man and man in sharing a pleasure and a pain? Yes, it is our lack of ‘understanding’ in right spirit and intent that stands in the space between man and man so much so that we live as disconnected entities.
Is not it our personal preoccupations that make us feel our own concerns as the chief concern and take a selfish posturing to safeguard it to that end?
All our cravings to evolve as decent individuals remain a mere wish fulfilling exercise till we get over our utter personal preoccupations and make our interest so impersonal that it serves a larger interest and a greater cause, as the creator would expect it.
In a definite sense, apart from living merely a subjective life, such an individual simultaneously lives in a heightened plane, fighting for a cause greater than him self. To be precise, all the thought and action of such a man get directed at transcending himself so that he ceases to be a captive-someone and changes in to an open entity, an-ideal-no-one.
The thought of such a man is reflected in the feeling of a poet, in these provocative words:
हमीं हम हैं तो क्या हम हैं ?
तुम्हीं तुम हो तो क्या तुम हो ??
“If I am merely me only, what am I? If you are merely you only, what are you??
A great spirit of universality lurks through the psyche of this man which find an expression in his unconditional love and concern for the Other-Man so that for him the sense of ‘self ‘ and ‘non-self’, integrate at a higher level and fuse together in a sweet blend. The otherness of the other assumes a human touch and interpersonal relationship is explored by him from a new vantage point.
To be precise, he gets equipped with a faculty to look from atop where all dissimilarities tend to dissolve and his own individuality is reinvented with a richer meaning and content.These sort of people are revered in our heritage as the very best specimen of Mankind, or the Salt of The Earth.
Such people do not just believe in shared values and shared understanding but foster it in every sphere of life so that it becomes a living faith, a convivial force to integrate every sphere of life.
Though these people do not aspire for or harbor an innate desire to shine in the glare of limelight, they keep on radiating their good-job silently in whichever discipline they hail from or whatever vocation they choose to carry out their living. Their sole guiding principle is Humanity at large and their one-point-program is to uphold it at any cost. If anything that is of utmost importance and of Supreme Significance for such a man, that is the sharing of joy with every other man creating an ambiance of bliss.
The boundary of such a man simply shifts away from his personal sphere and extends far, far beyond his circumference. His own self seems to be simply insignificant for him and the other man’s pulse and impulse seems to be of topmost significance.
And, it is through this very sense of his own insignificance that he upholds and affirms the significance of the Other-Man. It is through this very sense of his own unimportance that he upholds and affirms the importance of the Other-Man. Such people are really the bridge makers of our society. May their tribe always flourish.
Many thanks Sumita ji, for sharing such a beautiful write up.